January 29, 2007
By Rachael Hartman

 

 

Contrary to popular belief, the single woman’s Valentines Day does not have to be spent bummed out and lonely.  I have not always believed that happiness on V-Day was possible without a man in the picture, but experience has proven me wrong.  Three Single V-Days have had an enormous impact on my perspective. 

 

Valentine’s Day No. 1--Delivery Girl

The first one was four years ago.  I worked part-time at a florist during Valentines week.  The first part of the week was spent surrounded by roses.  I de-thorned, de-leaved, and cut stems on hundreds of flowers.  It was quite amazing actually.  The next part of my job came on the big day--delivering bundles of joy to dazzled women and shocked men. 

 

I will never forget the look on one particular man’s face when he received his gift.  I walked into the smoke-filled office of a local mechanic’s shop.  Two gruff-looking men, one in his early 30s, the other in his late 50s, occupied the small room.  I held the basket full of Coca-Cola and candy in my arms as I read the name on the card.  The older man pointed me in the direction of the younger; I heard him snort as I walked to the other side of the room.  Smiling, I read the name on the card again.  The young man looked at me wide-eyed and told me I had the wrong person.  Of course, I didn’t. He reluctantly accepted his unexpected valentine.

 

I love being the bearer of good news.  That day I went to offices, hospitals, and many homes.  Though I did not receive a single rose myself, delivering flowers that Valentines Day made it a special day I like to remember.

 

Single Valentine’s Day No. 2--Stupid Cupid + Me

My next example happened at Texas Bible College during my second year there.  The drama team always arranged a week full of fun for Valentine’s. 

 

• We had the opportunity to send “Crush Valentines.”  You could buy a Crush drink for $1 and send it to your crush.  Of course the recipient could also pay a dollar to find out who sent them the Crush, unless the sender paid extra to keep it a secret. 

 

• There were singing telegrams for sale.  Pay one dollar and the Stupid Cupid would serenade your love at lunch time. 

 

• My favorite part of TBC’s Valentines week was Secret Valentines.  This is quite similar to Secret Santa.  You draw a name out of the bucket and make that person feel special all week long.  Everyone would participate in Secret Valentines.  I drew the name of a good friend, who just so happened to be Stupid Cupid himself.  It was so easy to send him Valentines messages; I made posters, wrote poems, and bought small gag gifts to let my buddy know just how special he was.  Every day of the week there was something new waiting for him.  I had a blast. 

 

I ended up asking my Secret Valentine/Stupid Cupid friend to the Sadie Hawkins Valentine’s Banquet.  He wore a blue t-shirt that said “Cupid” on it with his Stupid Cupid angel wings.  I wore small purple butterfly wings and a pink T that said “I’m With Cupid.”  We had a great time.  It ended up I was his secret Valentine, too. 

 

Of course, friends can make all the difference on Single Valentine Days.  Making sure my friends and family felt my love for them has helped me make Valentines a great week, despite my single state.

 

Single Valentine’s Day No. 3--

This was the year I struggled to find Valentine’s Day happiness.  The social pendulum swung when I moved from Bible college straight to Home Missions.  Now I can feel the loneliness.  My friends are far away, and I am very alone.  Of course, being the happily-single, young missionary-lady that I am, I was determined to have a Happy Valentine’s Day.  And what better place to find Single Valentine’s Day happiness than Wal-Mart? 

 

To spare myself as much emotional pain as possible, and to save a few bucks, I waited until February 15^th to celebrate Valentines Day.  I almost made it through my regular shopping list when my lonely whining started,  “Oh, Jesus, can’t You just have some random man tell me I am beautiful?  You know that would make my day.” 

 

The silent answer whispered immediately back to my heart.  “I don’t want you to rely on their compliments.  I want you to rely on Me.  I love you.” 

 

The whining stopped, and I headed to the seasonal aisle.  I was digging through the 50%-off chocolates when my cell phone started playing “Smoke Gets in Your Eyes.”  It was my dad asking what I had planned for the night.  Oblivious to everyone around me, I continued to dig as I talked.  I had plans alright--a date with a pile of books.  I shoved my phone back into my purse and looked straight up into the eyes of the most handsome stranger I have seen in a long time.  Wow!  He smiled nicely at me as he picked up some discount chocolates and continued on his way.  I wonder if he and his sweetheart had decided to celebrate a day late, or if he was making up for male forgetfulness.  There is no possible way he was buying chocolate for himself.  I continued on to the roses.

 

I love flowers.  I have received flowers from men only twice in 22-and-a-half years; both times my heart melted.  I made up my mind, if a man is not going to buy me flowers, then I am going to buy one for myself.  After all, I am a good girl;  I deserve a pretty flower, too.  I picked out a coral-colored one and headed to the checkout line. 

 

At home, I placed the rose in a beautiful vase and opened my box of chocolates.  I received two Valentine’s Day cards this year: one from a girlfriend at church and the other from her two little boys.  I arranged my cards and “gifts” in a pretty setup on my dresser.  I felt special and loved.  I put on my “I’m With Cupid” T and played “Jesus I Love You” on the piano. 

 

I’m at my parent’s house with my dog, my chocolates, and my rose; Jesus is here, too.  It is amazing that I feel loved.  If you would have put me in this setting a few years ago, I would more than likely be crying, but I don’t feel like crying.  I feel like writing. 

 

Single Valentine’s Day 2007

Valentines Day is what it is made to be.  It can be a day full of Agape Love, or a day full of deep sorrows.  It is my choice.  It is your choice.  I want to be happy and loved by others.  I choose to be happy and love others, and when I show others love, I feel loved in return.  That is what Single Valentines Days are for. 

 

Happy Single Valentines Day, my friends--and let’s make next years’ even better!  :)     

 

ninetyandnine.com
 

© 2007, Rachael Hartman

 

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Rachael Hartman works full time at a travel agency, and is a part-time English Communications major at Armstrong Atlantic State University in Savannah, Georgia.  She enjoys traveling and studying, but her first love is found in ministering at Azusa Now UPC.  If not at a computer, Rachael can be found taking time to smell the many roses in her life; she has decided to bloom where God has planted her.